First Steps

Let me bring you to the beginning and the reasoning on why I want to have a healthier lifestyle. And I believe it's all about taking your first steps.

As a kid I was always kind of chunky and awkward. I was often picked on because I wasn't skinny and didn't look like the other kids at my school. I sadly started puberty at younger age than most of my peers so THAT didn't help my situation any. Think of Nia Vardalos' character, Toula, who in school would bring greek food for lunch instead of a nice turkey sandwich and because she was different, her character was shunned... Thusly, I felt because I was physically maturing faster than most of my peers made me always aware of my physical differences between us. 

When I was an early teen I took control of this situation and lost a bit of weight and became more active. But the picking on turned ugly and didn't stop, I had food thrown at me in my junior high cafeteria, it was mortifying. Those were things that only happened in the movies, right? No. It really happened and then it struck me later that it wasn't how I looked chunky or slimmer, but because I was actually different. Going to a private school and then shopping at Hot Topic I guess is something that clearly draws the lines between you and your peers. But I am sure the fuzzy, blue flame pants that I was wearing didn't help that food was thrown at me. Safely said though, I never wore those pants again. However, that kid in the cafeteria gave me the rest of the energy I needed in order to fulfill my goal. 

High school was a blessing. I found friends that accepted me for who I was and I could disappear into the art, music and drama department in which I felt comfortable in my skin. YAY! But then college came too quickly.. And so did the weight. The dreaded freshmen fifteen is due to the vast amount of carbs that is available in INFINITE quantities at all times of the day, oh and did I mention that you become pretty lethargic living in a concrete block and lose a lot of motivation to do much of anything that didn't involve going to class, homework and sleeping. Ah, it was a vicious cycle that year, not to mention that I transferred twice which due to the stress made me eat more... Great. Over the next few years I kind of "let myself go," I didn't eat the best, nor did I work out as much as I would have liked. I felt like 5 years later I looked in the mirror and was like, "Uh, so, hello double chin, when did you get there? Oh energy, where did you go?" It was awesome... oh, and so was stepping on the scale >.<

Well not really. 

So here I am. Day one. It didn't start off great, two pieces of cold veggie pizza for breakfast. I had kept telling myself over the last couple of weeks, in the new year, I will eat better. But, that had yet to happen, and the phrase, "I'll start tomorrow," kept running through my head. This morning I had decided to rejoin Weight Watchers, putting on my first points of the day was embarrassing, but the rest of the day was much better. I know though that this isn't going to be an easy task. Another thing though that I decided in the new year is that I am going to become a consistent practitioner of Bikram Yoga. I LOVE the hot room, once I started a few years ago, I was hooked, but because of school, work and multitude of other excuses I haven't been a faithful yogi. To go along with this goal, I bought some new yoga outfits and mat! And tomorrow I WILL not maybe, hopefully, I WILL go back into that hot room and begin the long sweat to a better me!